To Halloween or not to Halloween

As parents we are faced with so many choices, and so much input on what is and isn’t good for our kids on Holidays, and let’s be real, I dread a lot of holidays.

halloween-2009We have to think about sugar consumption, over-stimulation, allergies, appropriate costumes, road-side safety, etc. Isn’t it a heavy burden? So let’s simplify.

For the last four years we have engaged in two awesome traditions. The first is Team costumes. We made Halloween a chance for attachment and belonging. So for the last few years we pick costumes out as a team. So here are a few versions of team costumes by us.

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But for me all the holidays bring up the issue of being enough. I know they shouldn’t I know none of these days are really about me. But it is so hard to face holidays without some comparison. Did I make enough treats? Am I still a good mom if I don’t make it to even one of my kids Halloween parties? Is it okay that I bought all my costumes on Amazon because I don’t have time to sew them? I want to move through this day with a little grace, and if I fail am I still okay?

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On days like today when I fell out of bed at six, kissed the little kiddos who climbed into my bed, got my daughter going on breakfast, and got in the shower. Only to realize I forgot a towel, and conditioner (Because it was out and I hadn’t refilled it), then growled through breakfast, and mended a few costumes with hot glue, before running out the door to work, it is hard to think that is enough.

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I want to be the mom who made cookies, warmed cider, read stories, cuddled them closer, shared romantic smiles with my husband around the teenage eye rolls.

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I missed the costume parade. That one hurts the most. And it’s stupid that it hurts.But I know they wanted me there. And I have honestly only ever helped with One, yep just one, school party in my whole life. And I loved it. But I have to be at the office, typing these things on my breaks, to take care of my little people. They forgive me. I just don’t as well.

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So to myself, and to you working mommies out there, and you stay-at-homes who are swamped, it’s okay. We didn’t make it this year. WE ARE good, we love our kids, we hope the best for them. They are our team. And even if I never make it to another class party, I am good enough. Even if I only get to make warm cider for my grandkids, it’s enough. Even if I growl more than I should, we will laugh about it later.

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For now, let’s simplify, they went to school in a team costume, knowing they belong together, with us. And that momma is enough. That is extra ordinary. I don’t care how much sugar they eat today. I will feed them good food tomorrow. And give them vitamins, because I am a good momma. Extra-ordinary is enough for me to love myself. And by loving myself, and forgiving me for what I haven’t done, I will be a better mother, and a better person.

WonHundred Word Wednesdays

Here is our fun game, a bunch of authors write about a flash fiction post. Here is mine, when you’re done, go see what my friends wrote…

Jilly ran away often. Not that he felt proud of that, but she knew how to take care of herself. This time she’d been missing since Friday and he hadn’t worried. She’d taken her sword, her pack, and cloak. Nothing could kill her with those tools on board. But he hadn’t considered things that might not want her dead. Not until a package arrived via messenger wrapped in her cloak. The blue fabric murmured as he opened it, the wool rubbing on itself. Now Jilly wasn’t coming home. Killing the messenger didn’t solve it but it was a good start.

Denise Kasanicky createinspiredream.wordpress.com
Jaclyn Weist jaclynweist.blogspot.com
Jenifer Lee myfam-i-lee.blogspot.com
Jenna Eatough mistglenmoon.net/blog
K.R. Wilburn krwilburnbooks.com/blog
Kaye P. Clark kayepclarkwriter.blogspot.com
Laura D. Bastian www.lauradbastian.com
Miranda D. Nelson www.mirandadnelson.blogspot.com

WonHundred Word Wednesday

Here is a fun game we play to break up the craziness… We all write about a short prompt. Here is what I wrote. When you’re done, go check out my friends…

It was past midnight, probably near two in the morning. Smokey crouched on the edge of the wall, still waiting. She’d almost patterned out the movements of the guards. She glimpsed Aunt Mel’s face through a fluttering curtain. The lights appeared out of the darkness, three trucks lumbering down the road, kicking up rocks, making enough noise to wake the dead. Now or Never. Smokey stood, the song building in her head, the fire of her wings building in her back. I am the Phoenix, I am the Siren. I am death. She let the song pour out everything stopped.

Denise Kasanicky createinspiredream.wordpress.com
Jaclyn Weist jaclynweist.blogspot.com
Jenifer Lee myfam-i-lee.blogspot.com
Jenna Eatough mistglenmoon.net/blog
K.R. Wilburn krwilburnbooks.com/blog
Kaye P. Clark kayepclarkwriter.blogspot.com
Laura D. Bastian www.lauradbastian.com
Miranda D. Nelson www.mirandadnelson.blogspot.com

Be unapologeticaly who you are

It’s late at night, and i should be sleeping.

All my small minions sleep in their beds, and my handsome guy is asleep next to me. But it was another exciting day, and my mind is still spinning with unfinished things.

It’s Sunday, usually a “day of rest.” For me it is a day of “Run a little faster with a smile plastered to your face.” But not today. Today there wasn’t normal church. Today was a longer meeting where our small people haven’t been welcomed the same because they can’t sit quietly for two hours. So instead of enduring the shame that came with last year and the technology we only cave to once a year, we chose not to go at all. Instead we had hard emotional talks.

Also not restful. But important.

When life has so much heavy emotional content, like raising special little people, sometimes our own mental health fall by the wayside. Not on purpose of course, but it happens. And misunderstanding build.

So we started a talk, knowing we were diving into the deep end of the pool, while laying tile, while the kids watched show after show. And the pool was deeper than we guessed.

So, here it is, late at night. I love my husband, more than the sky. You can tell because, well, we have 7 kids, we own our own business, we’ve miscarried 6 babies, we’ve had major ups and downs, and I am still here. So is he. But those aren’t the things that either of us needed to know.

My small scared heart needed to know that with 50 pounds more than when we got married, a bum knee, and not always the best attitude, I was worth loving. I needed to know I was enough. That he saw me, The whole me, all the ugly stuff, all the pretty stuff, all the scary stuff, And he liked me anyway.

His teenage heart needed to know I think he is cute. He makes my heart excited when I see him. That I want to run away and make out in the car all the time even when there is no way we can really do that right now, because we are laying tile in our bathroom…But i want to.

So friends out there, remember: You are enough.

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Right now.

Right as you are.

Without any changes. Or excuses.

At the exact weight, height, strength, endurance, hair color, hope level, that you are.

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You are perfectly enough. Nothing you have done, or can do, will change that.

Even without a shower. Without a job, without a husband or wife. Without the deepest need of your heart . You are still enough.

And I am here to remind you to go out and be authentic. Be vulnerable. Be creative.

The world needs you. Right now.

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WonHundred Word Wednesday

Here is a fun game we play. We write 100 words about a prompt, and then our friends do the same. Here’s the prompt:

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Here’s what I wrote:

She clung to the piece of driftwood praying for daylight. Opa promised it held some protection against whoever did this to father, but Krissy was too little to understand. She just felt that slimy feeling rolling over her again and again. She pressed her lips shut and squeezed her eyes closed, the little bit of wood clasped in her little fingers. When the sun comes it will be okay. That thing only comes after us at night. I will be safe if the sun will come up. She buried her face in her big brother’s side as he snored on.

Now check out my friends:

Denise Kasanicky createinspiredream.wordpress.com
Jaclyn Weist jaclynweist.blogspot.com
Jenifer Lee myfam-i-lee.blogspot.com
Jenna Eatough mistglenmoon.net/blog
K.R. Wilburn krwilburnbooks.com/blog
Kaye P. Clark kayepclarkwriter.blogspot.com
Laura D. Bastian www.lauradbastian.com
Miranda D. Nelson www.mirandadnelson.blogspot.com

WonHundred Word Wednesday

Here is a fun game we play. We write 100 words about a prompt, and then our friends do the same. Here’s the prompt:

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Here’s what I wrote:

He was excited about the 150 new emails. Any one of them could hold information hat could help his family. Never before had anyone in the pack dealt with witches. Grandfather Fenris was shocked that they had made their way to America again. After the witch trials they had hexed the continent and sworn to never return. But obviously at least one wanted to get some attention.

And each e-mail might hold an answer on how to stop her. The one with a pentagram behind the words caught his eyes. “So you figured out where to start. Good luck puppy.”

Now check out my friends:

Denise Kasanicky createinspiredream.wordpress.com
Jaclyn Weist jaclynweist.blogspot.com
Jenifer Lee myfam-i-lee.blogspot.com
Jenna Eatough mistglenmoon.net/blog
K.R. Wilburn krwilburnbooks.com/blog
Kaye P. Clark kayepclarkwriter.blogspot.com
Laura D. Bastian www.lauradbastian.com
Miranda D. Nelson www.mirandadnelson.blogspot.com

WonHundred Word Wednesday

Here is a fun game we play. We write 100 words about a prompt, and then our friends do the same. Here’s the prompt:

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Here’s what I wrote:

It was up to her, that officer, whenever she arrived, to investigate how the accident happened. But it was Charyn’s job to tell the story. To spin it into the fine thing that articles took, like a spider with her finest floss. The baseball star groaned in the car.

“You alright?” she asked, pulling open the door. He nodded.

“I’d stay as still as possible if I was you. That car tried to take you out.”

He looked at her straight in the eyes. “I wish you were a reporter and would say that.”

“It’s your lucky day. I am.”

Now check out my friends:

Denise Kasanicky createinspiredream.wordpress.com
Jaclyn Weist jaclynweist.blogspot.com
Jenifer Lee myfam-i-lee.blogspot.com
Jenna Eatough mistglenmoon.net/blog
K.R. Wilburn krwilburnbooks.com/blog
Kaye P. Clark kayepclarkwriter.blogspot.com
Laura D. Bastian www.lauradbastian.com
Miranda D. Nelson www.mirandadnelson.blogspot.com